2 Weeks Post-Op

It’s been 2 weeks since my big surgery. The 7 day hospital stay was extremely rough, and recovery at home has been no picnic. I am slowly beginning to feel more human again, and am starting to be able to eat larger portions of food. Pain management has been a struggle, but is no surprise. 

In total, I had 4 larger tumors removed: 1 from my vulva, 1 from the back of my right shoulder, 1 from my right gluteal muscle near the hip, and another very large (approx 16cm) one from the left lobe of my liver. In order to remove the large liver mass, I lost the remaining segment of my left liver, which contained around 40 nodules in total. 

I woke up with an NG tube, the epidural they placed pre-op, a foley, a wound drain from my glute, countless bruises and punctures, 2 IVs in addition to my 2 picc lines, and 4 new, large incisions… not to mention all the extra cords for continuous cardio-respiratory monitoring. On post-op day #5, I had to have another wound drain placed in my abdomen due to fluid collection around the liver surgical site. This huge pain in my A stayed in place for 5 days until I was finally able to remove it. 

As I stated prior to surgery, the plan here was “palliative,” so there was a good amount of stuff left behind, which I have continued to struggle to process, not aided by the pain those spots are causing. All of the pathology reports mentioned “Therapy-associated changes are present in the background” in the resected tumors. This means that the integrative treatments I’ve been doing did Something, but unfortunately, not enough (yet). 

I honestly don’t know what else to say right now, as I’m simply trying to make it through the days with the pain and physical limitations, and spend quality time with Brandon and the kids. I am very tired and struggle to get or stay comfortable. So I do my best to support my body through recovery, unsure what my next steps will be. It’s incredibly difficult to maintain a positive attitude and strong spirit when the “experts” see and treat you like a ticking time bomb. But they are not me. They are not God. I am doing my very best to block out the negative noise and focus on my determination to live and heal. This isn’t to say there haven’t been a LOT of tears as I work through the grief and many other emotions.

Thank you for all of the prayers, well wishes, cards, gifts, and care. Once again, I’m sorry I can’t respond to every outreach. I/we appreciate you all ❤️‍🩹

Before: Abdomen from side, looking pregnant 😔. The left liver mass was pushing my ribs far out, separating them, and separating my sternum. The nerve pain was terrible and it was putting excruciating strain on my back. It was also squishing my stomach like a pancake, so I hadn’t been able to eat much in months.