1st Proton Radiation Complete

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I finally completed my first proton radiation treatment today. It’s been a rough week with continued unexpected hurdles. There was unnecessary stress simply getting insurance approval for this type of treatment. Then once that was figured out, we went down to Rochester on Wednesday prepared to begin, but the pre-treatment scan showed the lung mass grew and changed enough that the whole plan needed to be reconfigured. I have been devastated and disheartened. How could the stupid spot change That much in less than 2 weeks?! So we were sent home after I’d already been locked into the table and mask for a painfully long time. Unfortunately, they weren’t able to get the new plan recalculated for today’s treatment, but in talking with the radiation oncologist, it seemed to make more sense to just start attacking what we Could to avoid further delays. By next Tuesday, we should have the updated plan ready to go for treatments going forward. At this point I’m not sure how many total treatments I’ll need. The original plan was for me to be done on November 18th; now I’m not sure. The schedule is such a mess, it changes all the time, and it’s making it nearly impossible to plan the hundred other appointments I need to squeeze in, not to mention all the driving back and forth, the usual to-dos, and trying to spend time with the kids… oh, and, rest?!?

I want to be done with oncology. Forever. I want this all to be a distant memory. To be healed physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. To be living a life outside of constant terror and fear.

In the meantime, I’m diving into some aggressive healing therapies I haven’t tried yet. Cost and time have been the biggest barriers, but damn it all to hell at this point! I want to live!! I want to heal!! I’m doing Everything I can to be here as long as I possibly can, to have a Good quality of life, and Enjoy it with my husband and kids!

We appreciate your prayers and support for peace, healing, calm, love, and divine guidance as we continue this journey 💜

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Published by Lauren

Welcome! Thank you for being here! My name is Lauren Doyle. My husband and I have been married since 2013, and together since 2011. We have 2 wonderful kids and live in the Twin Cities suburbs. I have both a Master’s and a Doctorate and am a board-certified Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner. I also have the student loans to prove it. In 2019 our lives were turned upside down. Our daughter was born with a serious heart defect that required open heart surgery when she was just 5 days old. A couple weeks after her birth (while she was still in the hospital), I found a mass in my abdomen which required major emergency surgery to remove. At first, we were told it was just a fibroid; we learned about a week later that the mass was a rare and aggressive type of cancer – leiomyosarcoma. Through multiple surgeries and chemo, I have come out the other side, changed in many ways. I am now considered Stage IV, with a chemo-induced heart condition, and struggle with several other severe side effects from treatments. I continue to work and live and love as best as I can. I will not claim to have all the answers about anything, but I can tell you I have learned a LOT in my 35+ years of life thus far. My passion has always been helping and educating people in whatever ways possible. I am hoping this blog will allow me to do that for a broader population beyond the patients I see at work, share my unique journey, and help keep friends and family in the loop along the way. Thank you again for being here.

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2 thoughts on “1st Proton Radiation Complete”

  1. I’m so sorry you are going through this. If it’s any consolation, you look beautiful and peaceful. I’m praying for a quiet mind for you and a quick turnaround in your health. Hugs from afar.

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  2. Continued prayers for peace, calm, and especially HEALING as you go into your 2nd treatment tomorrow (hopefully). If cost is a factor to pursue aggressive treatment, maybe have someone close to you set up a GoFundMe! So many people care about you and want to do SOMETHING, but don’t know what to do. Would love to contribute to such a cause and I’m certain many others would as well! XOXO Sending the strongest positive vibes I can muster your way.

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