Sadly, the final days of these radiation treatments are a bittersweet, somewhat hallow victory. I still have cancer inside me. I don’t know what the future will hold. I watch people come out, ring that bell, and we all clap and cheer. I always cry. There’s no fanfare when I walk through those doors after treatment. No bell ringing. No cheering. Just me, fighting back the tears at reality.
As the days have progressed, it has become more difficult to walk. My left leg used to be my strong one, but now it’s buckling, too, which means I’m a bigger fall risk again. I’m walking much slower and am having trouble with any uneven terrain (even with the walker). Voice is getting hoarse. Dry mouth. Irritated/swollen throat. Swollen, sore neck and lymph nodes. Stiffness. Sensory changes in my legs. The numbness in my right arm and hand are getting worse (I was even having trouble holding up 3 fingers for this photo). Fatigue from treatment and lack of good sleep. Steroids are keeping me from sleeping well… and it’s all adding up.
Once again, I’m increasingly helpless and less independent. It’s been a tough week, to say the least. I’m glad to be done with this. But man, does cancer suck.
Thank you for your continued support and prayers. I certainly appreciate them all as I head into yet another period of recovery ❤️🩹💜
Welcome! Thank you for being here! My name is Lauren Doyle. My husband and I have been married since 2013, and together since 2011. We have 2 wonderful kids and live in the Twin Cities suburbs. I have both a Master’s and a Doctorate and am a board-certified Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner. I also have the student loans to prove it.
In 2019 our lives were turned upside down. Our daughter was born with a serious heart defect that required open heart surgery when she was just 5 days old. A couple weeks after her birth (while she was still in the hospital), I found a mass in my abdomen which required major emergency surgery to remove. At first, we were told it was just a fibroid; we learned about a week later that the mass was a rare and aggressive type of cancer – leiomyosarcoma. Through multiple surgeries and chemo, I have come out the other side, changed in many ways. I am now considered Stage IV, with a chemo-induced heart condition, and struggle with several other severe side effects from treatments.
I continue to work and live and love as best as I can. I will not claim to have all the answers about anything, but I can tell you I have learned a LOT in my 35+ years of life thus far. My passion has always been helping and educating people in whatever ways possible. I am hoping this blog will allow me to do that for a broader population beyond the patients I see at work, share my unique journey, and help keep friends and family in the loop along the way.
Thank you again for being here.
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4 thoughts on “Cervical Spine Radiation Complete ☑️”
I’m so sorry for all this crap you don’t deserve. But, damn! You look amazing!
Dear Lauren, Every time I read one of your updates, one word comes to mind: WARRIOR. That describes you. You keep going when the going gets tough. And even though you’re in complete turmoil on the inside, it doesn’t show on the outside. You’re beautiful, strong, one tough cookie. I pray for a miracle for you and prayers for continued strength until that miracle arrives. Sending love and hugs and many prayers to you from Central Virginia.
I’m so sorry for all this crap you don’t deserve. But, damn! You look amazing!
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Thank you ❤️
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Dear Lauren, Every time I read one of your updates, one word comes to mind: WARRIOR. That describes you. You keep going when the going gets tough. And even though you’re in complete turmoil on the inside, it doesn’t show on the outside. You’re beautiful, strong, one tough cookie. I pray for a miracle for you and prayers for continued strength until that miracle arrives. Sending love and hugs and many prayers to you from Central Virginia.
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You are so sweet, thank you 💗💗
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