The first of 3 radiation treatments to my cervical spine is done!
This experience is disturbing and traumatic, to say the least. I was fitted for my mask on Monday, and had no idea what was truly in store. I had to lie through a treatment simulation And an awful MRI while I was trapped in this device (the MRI also required the head cage, so it was constant claustrophobia throughout it all). It’s like something out of a horror movie, in my opinion. My head, shoulders, and upper chest are all pinned beneath a tight, hard mask, and I’m unable to move at all. My forehead is smashed so tightly in the mask that it leaves marks on my face for over an hour after it’s off. I can’t open my eyes while it’s on. I have a tiny nose hole through which to breathe. And I have to hold perfectly still without completely panicking. Sounds great, right??
Since I had no warning on Monday, I didn’t have a chance to mentally prepare ahead of time (or take any medication to help calm me). Now I have a prescription to take the edge off before heading into treatment, but it’s still an extremely unpleasant experience. I think anyone who’s been through head or neck radiation can attest: This is an unpleasant and scary ass process, even if you don’t have a history of claustrophobia.
The plan is for 2 more sessions this week, and then follow-up scans in 3 months.
I appreciate your love and prayers for peace through this process, and for a good outcome! I’ll plan to update more tomorrow 💜🌻
Welcome! Thank you for being here! My name is Lauren Doyle. My husband and I have been married since 2013, and together since 2011. We have 2 wonderful kids and live in the Twin Cities suburbs. I have both a Master’s and a Doctorate and am a board-certified Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner. I also have the student loans to prove it.
In 2019 our lives were turned upside down. Our daughter was born with a serious heart defect that required open heart surgery when she was just 5 days old. A couple weeks after her birth (while she was still in the hospital), I found a mass in my abdomen which required major emergency surgery to remove. At first, we were told it was just a fibroid; we learned about a week later that the mass was a rare and aggressive type of cancer – leiomyosarcoma. Through multiple surgeries and chemo, I have come out the other side, changed in many ways. I am now considered Stage IV, with a chemo-induced heart condition, and struggle with several other severe side effects from treatments.
I continue to work and live and love as best as I can. I will not claim to have all the answers about anything, but I can tell you I have learned a LOT in my 35+ years of life thus far. My passion has always been helping and educating people in whatever ways possible. I am hoping this blog will allow me to do that for a broader population beyond the patients I see at work, share my unique journey, and help keep friends and family in the loop along the way.
Thank you again for being here.
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Lauren MG Doyle 